Friday, December 27, 2013

mammas

Being a mom is...  different for each of us.

Moms that stay home -- Yes, your job is probably harder than mine.  You don't get paid.  The minions you deal with are messy and often ungrateful, they whine an awful lot.  You don't get a break and you don't get to leave at the end of the day...  I get it.  It's not easy.  It's been rubbed in my face on the internet often enough that I GET IT.  And I truly do respect that staying home with your kids is hard.  And amazing.  At the same time no doubt.

But I don't stay home with my kids during the day.  I never have (except for 6 months of glorious maternity leave) and may never have the chance.  And I have mostly made peace with that.  It is easier going to work now that the kids are older.  Once I had a chance to realize that I (and their dad) are still the single greatest influences on their lives and are leading by example.  Once I realized that though they are okay with going to school and daycare, they crave being home with mom and dad... we are their home after all.  And home is where the heart is.  Once I realized that they do indeed love us the very best, as we do them... I am finally more okay with leaving each morning.  I am just doing the best that I can for them.

It's still hard to watch my kids love someone else so fiercely.  It's hard to realize that I can't dictate to the caregivers exactly how I want my kids to be taught/cared for because you know what -- you can't force your own style on someone else. You just find someone who comes really close, who you respect for how they've parented their own kids, and you go with it.  Do I wonder sometimes if I could do better if I was around all day?  Sure.  Do I wonder sometimes if I would be way worse?  Definitely.  Then I stop wondering because all it does is make me feel bad about myself no matter what I am thinking.  So I go to work and I leave each day, I collect my paycheck, and I come home to the people who matter most.

A long time ago my favorite blog writer in the internets had a baby.  And then she had to go back to work (July 2012?) and she struggled with the thought of leaving that precious baby behind.  I knew that feeling.  She had asked for advice from other moms out there and her comment feed was immediately filled to the brim with advice.  I took the opportunity to sit down and really think about what it was like to work away from my kiddos and spent a few days writing an email to her.  It was totally cathartic for me to finally organize my thoughts.  I sent it off, hoping that it might help her, and hoping she might reply with a big thanks for the amazing advice!  Of course I was not realizing that she had probably gotten 4700 emails along with the blog comments... I never did hear back at the time :)  And I got kinda bummed about it.  It's funny how we pour out our hearts to complete strangers on the internet and then expect them to want to connect with us immediately??  Oh Jenn...  Anyway, I prayed about it and I did get over it, realizing that if I had written the email as a sort of therapy to myself (which it totally was) then my purpose was achieved, no matter what response I may have received :)  I'm always thankful when I can calm my own heart down through prayer.  And I always wished I had the balls to post the original email and thoughts on going back to work on my blog... but I was too afraid of offending people for that.

Last January the gal, Elizabeth, emailed me back a sweet response (you know the one I'd been previously stressing about).  What a confirmation that was for me, that the thoughts of my heart were well received and even helpful to her.  It was a real treat to get that email.  She asked permission to post my original email on her blog, and so of course I said okay.  Anyway, she recently posted some of her thoughts on mothering, working, and now again staying at home with her kiddo, along with some of my email (she wisely edited out my run-on paragraphs of nonsense at the beginning and end of it).  I thought maybe some of you would enjoy reading her thoughts (and mine).  Plus as a bonus you now have her blog address and I would recommend bookmarking it.  Girl has a way with words:

Elizabeth Ivie

So cheers to ALL my momma friends out there.  There sure are a lot of you wonderful people!  The ones who have a job away from home, and also those who's job is their home.  Those who are home, if I am grouchy towards you sometimes when you talk about the hard parts of your world, please give me grace.  The jealousy monster creeps into my head and it's not easy to get it out sometimes.  But know that I truly think you are all amazing.  And those that work away from home... Fist bump.  You get me.

Here's to 2014.  The year where I finally figure out this mothering thing.  Ha ha, yeah right!

Monday, December 16, 2013

It has come to my attention

Recently a friend of mine asked why I hadn't posted anything lately.  I had two thoughts:  1.  Someone actually still reads this?  and 2. Oh, hot dang, it has been awhile!  (ummm... two months... oops).

You know the whole reason I started this blog was to brag about and keep track of my insanely cute new son, Olaf :)  And I really had so much fun with it!  And then with poor #2 and less available time it just sort of dropped off.  Which is a bit of a bummer, because the best part of writing it is the ability to look back and see what we were doing, what we looked like, kids' milestones, fun photos...  Seriously, I love looking back at it.  And I have missed a lot of things that would have been fun to look back on I am sure.

All that to say...  I am still busy.  But I am going to put some photos up now that I can look back on in a few years and say, look how cute and little they were!  And look how random I was in posting them!

a little family photo on a visit to Steve while he was working up north

Olaf has learned many things in kindergarten.  Notably one of the best -- how to traverse monkey bars :)
Our first time on quads.  We like to teach the redneck part of our lives at a young age.

Look, Daddy bought us glow in the dark bat masks for our dance party!
Olaf and I stomped the yard and ye ol' Church square dance out at Stonewater Ranch. 

A typical fall Saturday afternoon of helping daddy with chores.
I ran another half marathon this year with a new group of ladies.  This is my friend Katie.  She's a keeper.  Let's all hope she moves to Leavenworth :)  (hint hint Katie)
Post race exhausted-ness.





I built Olaf a "fort" in the tree out front consisting of about  boards nailed up.  He LOVED it.

He still loves it.  However Steve has added numerous amazing features that only daddy's can do.  Like a platform WAY higher than any mom would ever allow.

Cuties at our school pumpkin carving night.

CHEESE!
Cutie cousins Olaf, Ingrid, Trygve

More of those 3 cutie cousins, catching the first flakes of winter while waiting for the bus.
So that takes us up to about... November 1st?  Ha ha.  Then we went to Florida.  I keep waiting for Steve to finish his sweet little video so I can post it on here... really I should just post a bunch of photos because who knows if the video will ever be finished :)  But it's late for this momma and I am heading to bed, so Florida vacation photos will have to wait!


Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Montana

Man.  If there ever was a most beautiful state in this country of ours... it might be Montana.  Now I'm not going to lie -- I think Washington is pretty much the champagne state of the U.S.  I mean, mountains to sound, wheat fields to the Columbia River, it pretty much has it all.  But it doesn't have Glacier National Park, like MT.  (which is fine because then it doesn't have the extra tourists either...).  But I digress.  Montana is freaking gorgeous.

Me and the littles got to ride the train out to visit our family of Saugens in Kalispell last month, and we had a lovely adventure.  Christie is a way better hostess than me -- she planned hikes, picnics, beach days, man -- we were set and had 3 days of non stop adventures :)  In the middle there she somehow convinced me to do a 50 mile bike ride around Kalispell.... now for dear sweet Christie, who is an amazing athlete, 50 miles is like 1/2 to 1/3 of what she could do.  For me it was like HOLY SHI* that was a long bike ride :)  The first 25 weren't too bad, considering I hadn't ridden a bike since May.  The last 25 (TWENTY FIVE PEOPLE) got progressively slower...  and slower... as my little quadriceps got tired...  But I completed it, and had a grand time doing it! So fun.  Next year Christie is going to do the full 100 mile ride.  I think I will just cheer this time.  

We had such a fun time visiting cousins and chatting over tea and whiskey at night.  I am going to have to plan another trip next year too.

And now for the photos!

All loaded up at the Whitefish train station and headed to Glacier!

The beginning of our hiking adventure.

Auntie Christie and the boys

BFF's.  Forever.  (Micah on the left, Olaf on the right, 2 weeks 6 days apart in age :))

Hot Dang.  Remember what I said about Glacier?  I don't edit these photos!


The traffic engineer in me was sketched out by so many things on the going to the sun highway...

Okay, Instagram edited this one for me :)




Huckleberry 100 ride!   (Well, 50 for us)

Post ride.  Still standing (barely).

Playground fun.  Forest Tucker and Kyler John.

 
Nerd alert.  Photo credit to Olaf.





Watch out for the bike gang on the streets of Kalispell.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Food Truth

This morning I had two cups of coffee, a chocolate chip cookie, and a mini twix for breakfast. My poor body -- It's a wonder it still functions some days!!!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone. That's right, I am totally technologically hip and with it.

Saturday, September 7, 2013

BIG KID


Olaf started Kindergarten last Tuesday at Beaver Valley Elementary.  

And on that day, I was that mom.

I took a billion photos that morning.  Of him, of he and his brother, of he and his cousins.  I put my 5 year old son on the bus, because he insisted on riding it with his cousins.  (plus he'd been waiting practically his whole life to finally RIDE THE BUS).  He walked right up those stairs with great delight, didn't turn back once,  and found a seat right in the front next to his friend Bohde.  I got all choked up when the bus pulled away and my eyes filled up...

Then I immediately loaded up Forest in the car and we drove over to the school to meet Olaf getting off the bus, so that I could take even more photos and walk him into his classroom. Did he need me to?  Nah.  He barely even realized I was there.  I needed to though.  For once in my life I needed to be the mom that went overboard on something.  That got to actually take a million pictures.  That got to talk to the teachers and say hello. Because you know what, that's probably one of the very few days I will get to do that this year.  I made that kid a Pinterest worthy bento-style lunch complete with heart shaped cucumbers and picks shaped like small animals.  Go ahead and roll your eyes now.  But that day I was an awesome mom.  I was the mom I wish I got to be every day today. 

And then I went to work.  Where I will be every other morning when my kiddo heads to school.  So I was super happy to have been that mom on Tuesday.





Wednesday, July 31, 2013

crazy all up in here.

Is every summer going to be freakishly busy like this from here on out?  Someone please tell me it’s not…  of course I have loved the things we’ve done, but I think I would love them more if I wasn’t so tired.  Though I pretty sure that parents of older kids have told me it just gets worse!  Ack!


Last Monday night was a softball game which I (wisely) skipped because Steve was gone and the boys and I needed some time at home.  (because this was a busy repeat of the previous week).
Tuesday night was an evening BBQ with old TTR friends down at their cabin on the river.
Wednesday I worked late and had a late softball game.
Thursday night I volunteered at the Pantry food bank all evening with the boys.
Friday night my in-laws came to stay with us and we had a big family dinner next door.
Saturday was a birthday party next d
oor for my sweet nephew, lots of outdoor housework, and then a date night for Steve and I in L-Town.
Sunday was Church, the boys and I spent all afternoon with Jaimi, Mariya, and Jaimi’s boys, then softball practice and a softball BBQ for all.
Monday was a family dinner at the Krenz’s and then a Pampered Chef Party.

All those weekdays I had work.

But the evening social events... those are self inflicted! I don't think my boys went to bed before 9 any of those nights... oy vey.  (they loved it by the way)  This week I am working hard to get them back on a better sleep schedule so we don't get all grumpy but so far I am not making a ton of progress.  But hey, 8 is better than 9 right?

This week’s schedule looks similar to last… 5-6 busy nights a week.  I am going to lose my mind…  not that I feel there is much to lose these days!  Luckily softball ends this weekend and we can get some normalcy before school starts in a month.  Gulp.

Anyway, that's what we are up to these days!

Monday, July 22, 2013

we had fun

A lot of fun was had in the first few weeks of July.

I have been running (jogging) a lot.  Of course, I think running a lot means getting out 3 days a week and logging 10 miles total for the week.  I mean, that's almost two hours of my life gone to running!  Which is a lot for this girl.  I signed up for the half marathon in October again, so at least this consistency will pay off somewhere, though I know I'll have to log more miles before then.  This year I've got Jenny and her friend Stephanie, my little sister, and my dear friend Katie from Seattle all running with me!  I can't wait!  (I can't believe I just said that I can't wait to run...  what is the world coming to?)



Fourth of July was celebrated with friends and food and a lively game of croquet up at the Jenkins' home in Merritt.  (No seriously.  It involved getting cliffed-out, and waterfall type drops of ledges, teleporters, extension latter wickets and stump jumping.)  A good time was had by all!






Steve went on 6 fire calls that weekend.   SIX.  Oy.  Being a volunteer firefighter's wife is definitely a sacrifice.  Next time you want to poke fun of a volunteer firefighter crew stop yourself and remember THEY ARE VOLUNTEERS and they do this on top of their regular jobs, unpaid.  I have a giant soapbox I like to stand on for this subject, but let's not do that.  Instead I will just say, phew, glad that weekend is over!  And now I will move on.  Though I reserve the right to come back to this soapbox later.



July has been busy busy busy.  Good busy.  We went to the lake one day, hiked the ditch, went to Church, had playdates, played in the pool and got all tuckered out :)  Also we cut everyone's moppy hair (hallelujah!).  The littles look so grown up with short hairs!  Agh!


Lake Wenatchee on a calm day!!

These photos are all from a little hike/picnic we did at the Fish Hatchery.
 




Playing in Grammy's dirt pile.

Bee sting?  Spider bite?

Too much fun at the lake...

Dipping our toes into the ditch on a Saturday afternoon.

More adventures to come and July isn't even over yet :)